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Once awake, I just lie in bed all day, moribund, waiting for something to change. Life --sigh-- goes on. Well, maybe for everyone else, but not for me. The endless days are all the same.Each day, I vaguely remembered enjoying the party, hating the lockjaw and sore asshole and pussy and feeling my boots, nightie and necklace dissolve around me in a chilly breeze. Then I struggled painfully to ultimately see Al just as he gets sucked into the coffin; feel his icy loving cock inside me; ... watch him dissolve. THAT'S when I wake up screaming again. This has been my life for FOUR DEAD years. Then the deep, deadly depression worsens.Every time I ask, Steve or Laura remind me of that malevolent night. No matter how hard I try, I still have no memory of how many cocks I sucked or stuffed in me, how many protein snacks I swallowed or otherwise captured or how I ultimately got home.All that was eclipsed by the noble sacrifice my Al made for me. I didn't realize how much I loved him until I. He demanded a beer, and although neither of us were old enough to drink, we had friends that had bought Mario a twenty-four case of BudLight and a large bottle of Jack Daniels. I hated the taste, but he spent at least one hundred dollars a month on alcohol. I brought him his beer and went back to the kitchen, to begin the cleaning, knowing that dinner would be demanded next. The days continued with Mario working odd hours, never really accountable, but I assumed it was where he was. The nights were always the same, I had to cook dinner, make sure the house was spotless, Then after bed, despite the doctors warnings he would proceed with his lovemaking advances which if I didn’t respond to properly, He would spend at least two hours screaming at me and then slapping me before he would take what he wanted anyway. I hated the way life was going, but I really couldn’t see an end. I felt sure that after the baby was born, I would only get worse. I took charge of picking out baby names,.
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