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But this shit’s serious. I’m going to take my fake driver’s license and try to get a real birth certificate with it. Never mind disbarment, they send you to jail for that.Is that what’ll happen to me? Am I going to wind up in for Christ’s sake Guantanamo with all those “enemy combatants,” rotting for years while they think up new and creative ways to keep me for just about ever?Well, fuck it, I’m going to do it anyway. It’s for Hugo. Jimmy. No, Hugo, let’s keep “Jimmy” for outsiders.I stop to gas up at the first station I see; I’m not going anywhere near the other place again. I even detour several blocks to avoid passing it when I get to town. But my trip is uneventful, and I find the post office and go buy a money order in happy anonymity.To fill it out I supercautiously go back to the car and privacy. I know it’s silly, but why risk people looking over your shoulder? I’m still not illegal, but it’s getting close. I paste on the stamps and walk over to the mailbox and now the deed. The next day I went to the studio to catch up on the last few wasted days. I checked my diary, ‘Shit!’ I had forgotten I promised to meet Meg for a coffee. I scooped up my bag, grabbed my keys and flew out the door. ‘Morning darls, so sorry I’m late.’ I gave Meg a big hug and a kiss. We’d been friends for years. ‘Thought I was going to have to share my news with the waitress’, she beamed at me. I looked at her puzzled. ‘Valentines is around the corner so my dearest sweetheart bought two tickets to the Cayman Islands! Can you believe it?’ ‘Wow, that’s awesome.’ I was very pleased for her. ‘So what have you two got planned?’ ‘Oh, just the usual – nothing. Same as last Valentines, and the one before.’ I sunk in my chair and lowered my eyes. ‘Don’t tell me you still haven’t had sex?’ ‘One year, two months and twenty six days.’ ‘No way’, Meg was shocked, ‘go and get fucked. Seriously, this is not healthy, go and get yourself fucked. I mean it. My brother’s available, think of it as an.
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