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It really was just awful what they found. I got called in just after the police arrived and saw the whole terrible mess. Unfortunately, because there were no signs anywhere of a forced entry there was no real crime to report. It really did look like someone had had one rip roaring party ... had a whole heap of fun then left a whole heap of mess that ended up costing thousands to rectify. The carpet had to be professionally steam cleaned and quite a bit of the furniture needed much more than just a few handymen to fix. And there were even a few holes in some of the walls that needed repairing and they certainly weren’t like that before the wedding. When the anti-nudity crowd heard about it, even though I reckon they caused it, they sent off a stinging report to the church’s head office in Springfield about the disgusting and immoral behaviour caused by the spread of nudism within the congregation. The Head Office seemed to buy into this report and sent one of the Area Elders down to. The leader had been designated Tanzania Jones—TJ for short. He was a typically tyrannical baboon alpha male and he had his lieutenants. They were Biff, HD (short for Humpty Dumpty), and Fenton. Biff was a younger, more brutal, and stupider TJ—or perhaps I can say that TJ was Biff all grown up and mellowed with age. HD was accident prone and was missing a foot when we rescued him, and one eye, and an ear, and quite a few of his baboon marbles. The only reason that HD was not named "Lucky" is that one of Calgary's wolf cubs bore that name. For all out sneaky mean the three didn't hold a candle to Fenton, smallest of the four alpha males. Fenton was always stirring up trouble so that he could savagely lash out—when he wasn't manipulating the others. I never turned my back on Felton.With all due respect to Spots and her girl Dawn, a small troop of baboons is a greater hazard than a jaguar. A troop of baboons would attack almost as one animal—no where near as coordinated as a Sa'arm.
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