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But theres one way in which my mind continues to try and ruin my life. I cannot stop thinking about sleeping other women. I told you, Im disciplined, and I never act on these feelings. But these feelings are more like that feeling you have when you wake up and you dont stop having it until you fall asleep but then you have it some more while you dream about fucking other women. I know most men probably do this kind of fantasizing, and you might think you go through this every day just like me, and though its a little difficult at times, its really not a life-ruiner. You have to understand – Im an addict by nature. I dont do drugs anymore, and the beast in me that always wants to turn off my life and get lost in a substance suddenly sees drugs all around me again. Everywhere. I see blonde, busty heroin walking by me every day on the sidewalk. I see slender little needles slinking around on the dance floor. Every kind of woman looks like just the kind of woman I want to scoop into my. It was a Friday night so most were heading out for a few drinks soon after which was always a good fun way to spend time concentrating on the moment rather than anything else that was going on.Like with any college there are loads of bars and clubs to choose from and it was some coincidence that Vicky was in the same club the group I was with ended up in. She looked to be having a good time and was constantly the attention of one suitor or another. As the night progressed it was my turn to mind the drinks while the rest of the group went to the dancefloor to strut their stuff. As I looked down at the people dancing a voice was at my ear, Hi there stranger. It was Vicky, She was wearing what most of the girls were a see through dress, especially under the club lighting and clashing underwear.I said to Vicky that she looked to be having fun. She said that she had but it was the same as before, it wasn't going to lead anywhere new. Vicky continued that we would both probably prefer to.
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