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"I can't wait to spank you." "Pat, why don't you sit on that chair over there, and Clyde, take off all of your clothes for your spanking." Now I was stripping before a complete stranger, and I was about to be spanked by her. "I told Pat how I examine you before your spanking, so after you have all of your clothes off, go over to Pat to be examined." Once I had walked over to Pat, she said, "First, turn around so that I may examine your bottom." So I turned and felt her hands on my bottom cheeks. She even spread them apart. Now I knew for sure that I was going to be spanked differently, today. "Now turn around so that I can examine your cock and balls." I turned again, and now her hands were examining my penis and balls. As she was handling them, I began to have an erection. Pat said, "Go ahead and get an erection. Then I can keep you in place better when I spank you." She finally let go of me, and hiked up her skirt. "You can lie over my lap now, for your. “How long have you been with her?” asked the second fella.“Six seasons.”A young Scotsman leaves home and moves to New York. After six months his mom calls him and she asks how he finds the Americans. “Horrible,” he says. “They’re always yelling and screaming. I hate how they constantly pound on the walls and stomp the floors.”“How do you get by?” she asks.“I just relax in bed, playing me bagpipes,” says the Scot.A man is on trial for cannibalism. He proclaims to the judge, “Well, your honor, if you truly are what you eat, then I am an innocent man.”I rang work and said, “I can’t come in today, I have a wee cough.”The boss replied, “You have a wee cough?”I said, “Wow, thanks boss, see you next Wednesday!”A fly is minding his own business when a gnat lands on its back. Bemused, the fly says, “Is there a gnat on my back?”The gnat says, “Gnat at all.”“That’s the worst pun I’ve ever heard,” says the fly.“What do you expect,” says the gnat. “I just made it up on the fly!”Little Johnny was.
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