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" I know."I turned my attention back to Rosie, who was examining me with a curiously intense expression.I smiled at her and slid my arm around Lilly's waist. "You know who's old? Your mom, she's really old."Lilly punched me over the heart. "Don't tell her that."Rosie grinned."Her birthday's next month and then she's gonna be ancient!" I deadpanned."Not so ancient that I can't wear out your little-league butt." she rasped, digging her nails into the side of my neck.I inhaled sharply, nearly hissing. I could feel tiny electric vibrations emanating from each individual nail. I twisted my head around and looked up."You're a feisty little senior citizen, aren't'cha?" I'm not the one with all the white hair, junior."I pushed my chair back using just my legs, pulled Lilly down onto my lap and wrapped both arms securely around her. She struggled for a moment or two then relaxed and snuggled up against my chest.I lowered my head, pressed my lips against hers and when the tip of her tongue. ..You _ARE _dead. Is this heaven? Hell? Probably Hell with how much you fap...and to _WHAT _you fap."You are not in Hell, Richard. You are not dead, either." You finally brave opening your eyes to find yourself in what appears to be a beautiful dreamscape. All around you is the funky, cosmos of space, far more vibrant than any sci fi you've seen. Looking down at the cold smooth surface beneath you...was a mistake. There's nothing beneath you. Oddly enough, you don't feel the vertigo you would expect when staring into a shimmering void when you were expecting ground.You rise and try to compose yourself, while further taking in the sights around you. Stacks of books stretching higher than you can see hover around as if carried by drunken invisible little men. There's also a plethora of doors, connected to nothing, yet you just know they each lead someplace fantastical. The centerpiece, though, is the throne. Or, rather, the man sitting upon it. he regards you with a warm smile through.
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