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Petersburg? Well, it’s just a dream. Oh quick interjection. The other day my mom asked me the six things I could not live without? I’m thinking like, mom, any teenage daughter is gonna know you’re filling out your OK Cupid profile if you ask a question like that. Gosh. You’d think she’s a bit beyond Internet dating considering all the guys she can meet through work? Anyways, I didn’t make fun of her. I know it must be tough to have been dumped for a twenty-five year old hottie. Do I sound like a blond bimbo so far? Well I’m NOT! I have really dark hair haha. Oh and I’m expert at a few things so don’t think I’m useless. I’m really good at converting oxygen into carbon dioxide. I like to say I’m great in bed. I can sleep for days. My mom (when she’s pissed at me) calls me a “jack ass of all trades” and a master of none. Shit I digress too much. Hey I can be used for something. I can be used as a bad example. I’m also quite pleasant on the ears when it comes to belting out a tune. I. "No, whatever you may think, Barry, I do understand," she continuedcasually. Conversationally, with a lilt she often used with her friendsbut never with me. Girl to girl? "I've had lots of time to think aboutit, read up on it, ask around, chat with people on transgender websites,and so on. Look into movies about men who need to do this sort of thng.You know? It isn't so strange -- I sometimes wake up mornings feelingsomething of what you feel. In reverse, I mean. Imagining I'm a man, agruff guy trying to take charge of everything. Wondering if I shouldlurch around the way men do, haul up my pants and throw on a shirt someSaturday and not bother with makeup, not bother thinking about what's inthe fridge for lunch. Do a few household chores maybe -- clear a sinkdrain or put away the garden tools. You know. Hang out, read thepaper, watch football on TV, be the man of the house, do the things youdo when you're being the man of the house. When you aren't being ...what you are.
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