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I felthumiliated...duped...there were no words to describe how I felt?athousand were close, but none of them were exactly right. I don't knowhow long I stood there, on the verge of crying, letting the odd,shameful feeling build. I just know that in the end, I let out a long,painful, howling moan, as loud as a scream, filled with all of my rage,horror, and frustration. Then I collapsed.I was off for nearly a month between crew assignments, and it passed ina haze. I was not surprised to find that she had emptied our checkingaccount, although she'd somehow acquired a credit card and maxxed itout. Luckily, I received a bonus at the end of the first week off, andwas able to pay off the new card and close the account while stillhaving enough to live on. There were a lot of ramen and biscuit mealsin my future, but I'd make it. I was served with divorce papers by thesecond week, and signed them numbly. They were a preliminaryseparation agreement for a no-fault divorce that. When I'm making love to her I think about it.I finally told her. At least she didn't freak out. Finally admitting it made me feel better.Then one night when we were messing around in bed she asked me to tell her more about the fantasy. She was holding my penis, which she knows lowers my resistance. But I thought the fantasy was strange and I didn't want to tell her more. She insisted. Since the cat was already out of the bag, I filled in some details.I said that in my fantasy I have invited a man over that you don't know and after wine we watch this this porno video where a wife gets fucked by a neighbor while her husband watches.My wife said, "So that's it?"I said I left out some parts. The woman in my fantasy is you and the guy is someone you don't know.I said, in my fantasy the movie turned you on and I could see that it did the guy I invited over too. In fact I could see his erection, so after a while I ask him if he would like to fuck you.My wife said, "Just like that, you ask.
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