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So now I'm over my embarrassment and I'll write what I couldn't write last night. I'm getting to be an old maid! I'm almost twenty-seven and I've never ... well, I'm not going to write that. I'm not that drunk. But I'm an expert at masturbation. I wonder if the real thing is better? (Is a coke bottle 'the real thing'? I ought to try.) But, ever since Uncle Bill touched me, ten years ago, and got me all excited, I've been scared of guys. Maybe it would have been better if he hadn't had an attack of conscience and stopped when he did? Or even if I'd agreed to let Janey be my room mate at college. Now, when I think back, even if it's degenerate, it was sure satisfying. But if we'd been room mates and doing that on a regular basis, someone would have caught us. Anyway, it's back to my faithful five. (Fingers, that is.)Dear Diary - Annette got drunk last night. And I seen her diary, only she calls it a journal. She plays with herself, just like me. But she aint never had the real thing.. " Me?" I giggled."So what are you complaining about?" Daddy gave my mom's butt a little spank and then winked at me. "I guess we need better lies, huh?" I don't know any other ones." I stuck out my tongue."That's good," Mom smiled at me. "One lie is enough for any girl." What's your lie then, hmmm?" Dad was holding Mom around the waist now, his chest against her back and his chin on her shoulder. My mom was tall enough so they went well together like that."I'll never tell a fiend like you!" Mom gasped and giggled as Daddy gave her a squeeze and then a little push with his hips, and it wasn't like I hadn't seen them fool around before.I thought it was pretty cool that my parents were in love like that cause I knew some parents weren't. They were both good looking too, so probably that helped a lot. My dad looked like a doctor, very clean with gentle features and warm hazel eyes. A strong jaw and straight nose. He had short brown hair and a nice shape to his body. He always wore a suit.
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