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I was an embarrassment to my former self. But I did not change my ways, in fact things worsened. As I was now 18, I became attached to alcohol. I drank at home and in excess at parties. I became the kind of sexual deviant that I used to look down on, having pointless sex with girls who couldn’t care less. It somehow made me feel like I was overcoming my two former loves, but it was just a pathetic mask for my pain. The love I shared with Zoe and Kylie was irreplaceable, no amount of meaningless sex could make up for the true feeling of love. Subsequently, my grades began to drop. I was a proud B+ student before my fall into darkness, but since I had forsaken myself I was scraping the barrel for a C. But I didn’t care, I exchanged my former values and persona for a façade which made me look like a happy man in front of Kylie and Zoe. I didn’t know if they saw through me, but part of me wished that they would pull me up from the darkness I had fallen into. Two months after we broke up,. As did Jake. The Jims and Kevin were holding bottles of beer. Jake had white wine and I had brought a bottle of Bordeaux.It was a fun afternoon even though I was the butt of the jokes since the Dolphins were having their way with the Pats and won easily. The conversation went from sex to politics to the game, to sex and other sports and back to sex. Kevin said the he was exploring going to Yankee fantasy camp next year. That got a big laugh. White Jim's fantasy was to fuck Joanie, the leggy red head with the nice rack. She was new to the office and white Jim wanted to be the first to nail her. The others laughed at what his wife would have to say about that.White Jim's wife must have been watching the game at home, since the minute the game ended, his cell rang. She wanted to know when he was coming home. They rode together, so black Jim had to leave as well. Next it was Kevin's wife. Same thing. Kevin apologized for booking. I told him to go ahead. I would help Jake clean up. The.
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