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?”“Will you participate?”“I would love to, if anyone would find me sexy enough.”“Oh, Dr. Valerie, you will blow them away.”“Call me Kelly, please,” I said.“That settles it. We will see you on Friday.” During the week before the festivities, I completed my speech manuscript; spent a few hours a day naked in the sun; had my pussy hair removed; had my prematurely greying dark hair cut short and did some last-minute shopping. At home, I walked mostly naked and when I went to town, I dressed in a short thin summer dress with spaghetti straps and nothing underneath. That caused a few wide-eyed stares, a lot of clicks from disapproving women and sexy grins from aroused men.As Friday drew closer, I became nervous to go on my own to a nudist swingers’ convention in the Magaliesberg Mountains in South Africa. What made me agree to such insanity? As a respected lecturer at the University of Johannesburg in Integral Theology, I should not even have considered going public in the nude. And there I. Starched button-down off white shirts with breast pocket protectors filled with ink pens, sharpened number 2 pencils and a slide rule.They all wore deck-shoes, and that felt odd to me; 55 miles to the ocean and all these academic looking old men are wearing deck shoes.Off in the distance, a bell clanged. Down the street a horn tootled.Like puppets, the locals folded their newspapers, reached under the table, retrieved a white hardhat with some foreign writing fore and numbers aft, stood and filed out the front door of the restaurant.A white school bus type bus stopped at the side steps, the men filed onboard, flashing a wallet badge as they passed the armed driver and took a seat, starting at the back and filling the seats on both sides as the bus idled. The driver stood, picked up a chart, and started checking the seating.When he got to the middle he stopped, gave the two old men seated there a look. He cleared his throatThey jumped up, exchanged seats, and sat back down. The driver.
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