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.. That was the 1st time I remember. From there I starting todress more.Going to goodwill during college breaks to pickup some dresses or try ona wedding dress.There was a time I explored much more of my femininity in my late 20'searly 30's. Going out dressed en femme, shopping shopping =), going toclub dances, meeting other sisters like me, goin to various meetups andparades dressed. It was a alive exp.Then something happened and stopped exploring, a failed encounter with aguy one night in a bar, made me think I wasn't up to being a gurl sinceof rejection. Somehow that stopped me,.... Leaving me in a gray area...failed as a man, failed as a girl.I still dress, butNow I'm more man than girl for now since of work life and fam.During exploration in my early 30's I felt more gurl than boy for those1-2 years.Now in my mid/ate 30's I just feel lazy and fat and big, losing interestin many things, except the dream of being feminine. Dressing girly fromthe privacy of my appt.It feels like. I was sitting in my office one weekend day, not too long ago, when Dani stuck her head in my office and asked if she could borrow a notepad and a pencil.I rummaged through my desk drawer as Dani stood patiently in my office doorway, watching me hunt down a pad and pen. She apologized for being intrusive. I assured her that her request was not a big deal and that I was more than happy to oblige.Dani brushed back her long brown hair and asked about my work. I told her I was a porno reviewer of literacy pieces. She stayed quiet for a second, trying to digest what I had just said.She chuckled.“What do you really do?” she pressed.“I sell insurance,” I replied, waiting for a second before adding, ‘between literary reviews.”“You don’t really do that, do you?” Dani pressed.“Yes, I do,” I replied matter-of-factly. I handed her a writing tablet and a pen. “Do you want to read some of the stuff?”Dani took the writing tablet and pen and withdrew from my office doorway, proffering a quick,.
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