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The objective critic in me realized I was a certifiable old fart.I had grown a bit too comfortable in my old age, not overweight, but I tended toward the flabby side. My stomach and legs were fish’s belly pale. A box of rubber bands displayed better muscle tone than I did. If I had to run around unclad, I at least wanted to look sexyThe evening dinner, like all meals in the commune, was served buffet-style. The evening offering was beef Wellington. The sisters in the kitchen displayed some serious cooking skills. Wrapped in homemade puff pastry and an aroma of pure delight, the filet of beef tenderloin, assembled with liver pate, mushrooms, and onions indeed was fine dining worthy of a five-star eatery.I worked my way through the serving line and took a seat at the far end of the community table. I sat down in a social twilight zone; halfway between sitting close enough to be “next” to someone, yet far enough away to be “by myself.”The last twenty-four hours had buried me under an. What sorcery was this? Oh wait, it was my phone, and it was alerting a text. I approached it like you would approach a sleeping grizzly. Swiping to unlock it I saw I had one unread message. Maybe it was Pizza Hut informing me about their latest discount on a double crust cheese filled pizza. Tapping on it revealed three words, Who is this? Of course. All my planning and strategies and I had forgotten she didn’t have my number, only I had hers. Stupid, stupid, stupid. Uhmm……. Its Brian, I don’t know if you remember, we met last night at the club, I kinda made you a year older by mistake. Yes, that is what a girl wants to hear, that she’s old. My knight in shining armor! A warm feeling spread in my stomach that suffocated the rats. Die scoundrels die! You give me too much credit. How are you? Oh you know how it is in old age, if I don’t pee myself I consider it a good day. I laughed out loud at that one. She was almost as bad as Nick and Jenna. You’re never let me forget it are you?.
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