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For weeks he passed my desk at work, we nodded, greeted one another and I wore the friendly smile you wear around a stranger. He had called me when I was still at work, asking me what my plans were and made himself part of my schedule of that day. I had always loved it when men made decisions like that so I agreed to meet him.Our first date was a success, probably my longest first date I ever had, without feeling long. I was conflicted, I had told myself not to go home with someone on a first or second date, but here I was waiting on him to appear and technically it was still our second date.Sitting in silence, staring at my bra laying lifelessly on his wooden floor that he had ably taken off without taking off my shirt. Even though I was so aroused, I was still hesitating if I should stop this all now I still could. That hesitance lasted but a moment and it passed as quickly as it appeared as he came back. He opened my legs and stepped between them, staring in my eyes with lustful. . I'm no better. Not one single shred better.FUCK!I fucking hate myself so much right now. What the fuck do I do? How do I make this right? There's got to be a way. Think, man, think.I had been here before. Standing at Jenny's door, wracked with guilt, too cowardly to knock. I found the courage to do it before. Just do it, man. Knock. Get it over with. Tell her, "No more 'service', Jenny." And this time tell her why. All of it. And tell her you'll get help. You and her together. You'll see a counselor, you'll work this through.I knocked. There, I did it.The door opened and, there she was, beautiful, just beautiful. Her hair was all in curls. She must've had it done again. It looked... she looked amazing. She was wearing a tight white turtleneck sweater and white jeans that clung to her legs like they had been painted on."Come in and sit down," she said coldly. She sat on the easy chair across from the couch. I sat down.She was ... she was mad. I could see her biting her lip. Her eyes.
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