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All my fantasies at that time were just happening deep inside my mind where I was constantly thinking of myself as a girl. I was imagining what that would be like. I also felt very excited about it all and wanted desperately to be a girl.Then when my father became convinced I was TS, everything just got going according to agreed plans. I was asked about how I was feeling as the plan proceeded and all that, but I just never told them the truth! So everything kept on going.In hindsight I have always had a strong fascination or even a powerful sexual excitement about my physical change from a male to a female. I think this was the main reason why I wanted so much to become a female.Although I never told this to anyone, it was even existing as a powerful motive to my gender change ambitions when they began and this strong sexual feeling kept me going right through my transition. That was despite the crazy fact that I realised quite early on that I didn't really want to go through with. I enjoyed being able to wash my face and hair as we chatted about how we were days from their home world. Lara helped me pick out a nice sexy gown and styled my hair as we prepared for my private dinner with Oliver. This was the first time since I had my filters put on that we'd had such a private meal, and I would also like to end our evening doing more than just cuddling. I mean, it wasn't that I was sex fiend, it was just, since the nightmares had stopped, I'd wanted to enjoy some quiet intimate time with Oliver. We hadn't been able to enjoy any 'sexual relations' due to all the work that must be done to run the ship. The dinners were set on the small table and Lara stood guard outside of our room. She knocked once so I knew when he was close and I stood by the window with my back to the door. I heard the door slide open as I looked out at the universe.I felt Oliver's hand on my shoulder as he said, "Good evening Alexis."I turned around and said, "Good evening Oliver."He gasped,.
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