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”“Excuse me?” I said, astonished.“I think that’s what I need, a second girlfriend.”“You need another girlfriend?” We had met a pretty brunette after school holding his hand, but we doubted he had gotten anywhere past the hand-holding stage. Now he was looking for another?I looked over at Kelly who was just shaking her head. “He’s the reincarnation of your brother,” she muttered. To Seamus, she said, “And that’s not a good thing!”“Where did you come up with this brainstorm?” I asked.“Seamus, this is dumb, even for you!” added Riley.“I found on the web a formula for figuring out the perfect age of a mistress,” he said.“You found a formula? Why don’t you tell your mother? You know, the professor of mathematics?”He looked at his mother and said, “The guy takes his age and divides it by two, and then adds seven. I just turned fourteen, so if I divide by two, I get seven, and then add seven I get back to fourteen. Cool, huh!”“Uh, huh,” she said drily. She gave me a look that meant,’ Do. The next day there was an announcement that period four was being turned into a special assembly. They were going to have a visit from a police officer to speak about safety for high schoolers. Fourth period was mostly PE classes and school committee meetings and such. It was just before lunch, so no real classes were ever scheduled then.I met up with some of my friends and we went into the auditorium. As usual we went up to the balcony, where we could get a better look at the stage and stuff that way. We could also get out quicker. There were fewer rows of kids heading for the exits up there.All of the student body was required to attend the assembly and all the names were registered as we went in. That was unusual.First there were some school announcements, most of them were old news and we paid little attention. Then the next speaker was Coach Craven. "There's something I want to clear up. Most of you were at the game two Fridays ago. I'm sure you recall the ridiculous foul that.
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