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Lena and I finally got away from work and home to get ready for the celebration. I'd booked a side room at the club, for eight o'clock onwards for a party of twenty. I had paid £1000 up front so that the food and drinks were free and a live all-black woman band called The Black Roots were booked and paid for. I'd pay the rest if needed by credit card. We got ourselves dressed up. I chose all black underwear with a shortish tartan skirt and a scoop-necked black top. Lena went for a pair of navy blue culottes and a white lacy buttoned top. Underneath she wore one of her sexy purple lingerie sets, we both had a lot of cleavage on show. We got a taxi to the club and arrived there at seven thirty to make sure that the food was put out and that everything was set. The Black Roots were already there and starting to warm up, and the guests started to arrive at eight fifteen. I was overjoyed to see Elaine turn up, she looked stunning and I noticed Sophie taking an interest in her.The. ALSO, now I have to scrub the top of every can I open for the same reason.I can't have a drink in a bar because I fear I'll wake up in a bathtub full of ice with my kidneys gone.I can't eat at KFC because their chickens are actually horrible mutant freaks with no eyes, feet or feathers.I can't use cancer-causing deodorants even though I smell like a water buffalo on a hot day.THANKS TO YOU I have learned that my prayers only get answered if I forward an e-mail to seven of my friends and make a wish within five minutes.BECAUSE OF YOUR CONCERN, I no longer drink Coca Cola because it can remove toilet stains.I no longer buy fuel without taking someone along to watch the car, so a serial killer doesn't crawl in my back seat when I'm filling up.I no longer use Cling Wrap in the microwave because it causes seven different types of cancer.AND THANKS FOR LETTING ME KNOW I can't boil a cup of water in the microwave anymore because it will blow up in my face, disfiguring me for life.I no longer.
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