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You didn’t say anything, but you probably thought my building dolls was nuts. I actually went to a female shrink years ago. It was after college and I was living on my own and my shrink said I was dissatisfied with the men I met and was searching for a way to build my own man. She said, ‘Heidi, this isn’t healthy. You could lose touch with reality.’ She used hypnotism to take me back through my childhood looking for the cause of my obsession. ‘My parents were both college professors and pushed me academically. That wasn’t a problem for me, particularly in science and math because I enjoyed those subjects, but it separated me from the rest of the class. My nickname was, ‘The brain’. I spent most of the time with the boys doing science and math and the girls resented it. I never tried to attract the boys, but they seemed to be attracted to me. My shrink says I give off some sort of an animal magnetism. I’ve had enough studies of human behavior, so I understand what she was saying, but. He didn't care, though. To him, the scar was just proof that she was alive. If he had the guts, he would tell her that, and how much he loved her. Right, he thought. If I had the guts . . . and apparently, I don't. x-x-x-x Connie stretched and yawned at her desk. She couldn't put it off any longer—it was time to go home. So far she'd been successful in her attempts to avoid spending time with Simon. She knew she was being silly, juvenile even, but she couldn't help it. The episode with Ron had embarrassed her to no end, and she couldn't look Simon in the eye. The worst part was that she knew Simon wouldn't say anything if she did talk to him about it. He would hold her hand, or put an arm around her shoulder, let her talk, and then find something to say that would make her feel better. So she was doing this for nothing, and denying herself just about the only comfort she could get. She had told her sister about it, and Emily had sympathized and even understood why she was avoiding.
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