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Sorry buddy! I’ve had my head so far up my ass that I’ve forgotten to tell you that Gail wants you to call her.”“Who told you that?” I asked.“Uh ... she did!” he said. “Uh when I was over at their dorm looking for Wendy ... she uhm...”“Stalker,” coughed one of our friends, on the sly.“I am not a God damned stalker,” hissed Ed.“Tell that shit to the police and see if they let you out,” laughed the first guy.“Why does Gail want me to call her?” I asked. “Sorry ... Ed, but our date was barely better than yours. Gail is pretty, but we have no chemistry. I see her as more of a friend than anything else. Our goals are not compatible.”“So why not call her and talk Ed up,” said the first guy. “You can convince her that Eddy has moved on and see if you can get her to date him, so he can show off for Wendy.”“I’m not sure I should get involved in this,” I said. “This could all go terribly bad.”“It’s not like you’re interested in Gail,” whined Ed. “Be a pal. Do THIS for me and I’ll owe ya. Brains of older people are slow because they know so much.People do not decline mentally with age, it just takes them longer to recall facts because they have more information in their brains.Scientists believe this also makes you hard of hearing as it puts pressure on your inner ear.Also, older people often go to another room to get something and when they get there, they stand there wondering what they came for.It is NOT a memory problem, it is nature’s way of making older people do more exercise.SO THERE!!I have more friends I should send this to, but right now I can’t remember their names.So, please forward this to your friends; they may be my friends, too.Lotto WinnerAt breakfast, the husband says to his wife, “What would you do if I won the Lotto?”“I’d take half and leave you,” she says.“Great,” he says.“Here’s $6. I won $12 yesterday! Stay in touch”.“Private Lessons” {Proceed at your own risk.}A husband and wife love to golf together, but neither of them are playing like they.
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