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Dave was the most boring man I knew, and he was guaranteed to take the path of least risk. Dave knew he was conservative by nature. He delighted in the fact. Dave’s outlook on life was particularly inexplicable given that both his parents were so full of energy and vitality. You know something's gone wrong with the nature of things when a father tells his son to 'fuck-off, you boring bastard' as he hairs around the garden blasting a football into the flowerbeds while his teenage son stands aghast, shaking his head disapprovingly."No son of mine," he said, semi-seriously. "I knew that when the fucker was born wearing slippers and a smoking jacket."The only interesting thing about Dave was his name and his nickname. He'd decided to shorten it from 'David' to 'Dave' (hoping to become known as 'Dangerous' Dave - in homage to an early computer game by his computer programming hero, John Romero) but instead he'd been Christened 'Disco' Dave as an ironic statement as to the last place you'd. Although the sisters were the same height Esmerelda had shorter legs and a longer body. Not really noticeably so but when they were side by side all these small things made Esmerelda look positively plain in comparison to her sister Eleanor. Every evening, four princes from all across the land would be selected to visit the castle hoping to be chosen by EleanorThey would line up in the greeting hall and Elanor would stroll casually along the line of suitors to choose one to accompany her at her table for dinner. Esmerelda would stand with the king and queen, her head bowed slightly, her shoulders drooping, watching her more beautiful sister parade in front of her suitors.After the selection was made the three unlucky princes would be ushered to a seperate dining room the king and queen would accompany Eleanor and her chosen prince to the dining hall. Esmerelda would follow along behind quietly and the dinner would always happen the same. The prince would tell of battles he had fought.
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